I can’t help to be bombastic. Many years telling stories, they have forged a brain machine of metaphors, symbols that allows me to give some answers… well… I’m listening to myself and I ask: “baby, what are you doing, you’re from Albacete, and you’re speaking as if you were the Oracle of Delphi?” In other words, not even John Doe understands you (I don’t know who John Doe is either, but he gives a lot of margin to play with, like Tom, Dick or Harry and so-and-so).
The fact is that when they ask me what the hell is going on… what comes to my mind is that today, although this is nothing new, we are facing a decision: we have to choose between matter and magic. The matter is: security, the economy, the clan and the structure that supports it, society, beliefs… a religion turned into a science that knows everything, even if it knows nothing. It assures you “to Certainty” that has all the answers and when it makes a mistake it does not back off, does not apologize and much less corrects it. It only goes forward in a delirium of a greater confusion. A science that does not admit questions and that treat as crazy, medieval, stupid and dangerous people to those who question it. This is a science that conceives that owns knowledge and places itself at the service of power. A science that uses fear and that, despite its apparent modernity, denies the power of the body itself and also an evidence that is incontestable: our own mortality. Dying is wrong, it is a failure of Humanity, and it is a mistake. If there is something that is wrong… it is an error… so makes it easy to get into the play of blame and guilt. Our society has been structured for centuries around this Machiavellian game … there are innocents and there are guilty people. If you think different from the crowd you immediately place yourself in the eye of the hurricane of guilt and responsibility for the evils of the world. They say we are modern, but we are really going back to feudalism… we have been going back to feudalism for a long time.
On the other hand there is magic. I believe that magic is the Mystery that makes each one of us know as an individual being, with our own knowledge, our own vision of the world and that, thanks to feeling it, a different thought is possible that does not separate us, instead unites to go ahead. And yes, it is a Mystery, perhaps, because it is not a thought, is a feeling, an experience of individuality that leads you to feel connected with the other drops of the ocean. Because maybe that is what we are, an ocean. An ocean that feels immortal, connected, free and trusts in life. Not to do nothing, but to be attentive to its pulse, to its direction and to surrender to what is true for you and nobody else than you.
During centuries the schools of knowledge have kept together without splitting life from death. Because there is no separation, that’s the magic. Much progress has been made in accompanying birth, and we are starting also to accompany while dying. Even though we are still light years away from being able to speak about mortality, disease, and how to decline in a natural way. In this way of understanding death there is not an iota of compassion … it is still tinged with guilt, something we have done wrong.
Finding answers to the question why we die or get sick is beautiful, but if we stay in the matter, the norms, the rules, etc., we will always focus on the failures of the matter (the body) or on the moral of the system: I did not wash my sins, I did not learn enough, I did not cleanse the clan, I was not good, I did not take care of myself…
This is why I believe that if we pay attention to magic, and we are able to flow on our internal desire to experience, to live situations, to know that we are connected to something that is not different from all of us and that takes us where we want to go, we will be able to feel trust, surrender towards life and towards death as part of life itself.
I recently met my mother. She almost does not recognize me anymore, she is at that moment in which we let go our ego and prepare for the trip. That moment in which there are moments of supreme lucidity. I asked her if she was afraid of dying and she said no. I asked her what she felt that would find after death and she came out from her “complete in herself” state she is in (what a beautiful expression «to be complete in ourselves») and her bright and sharp eyes appeared to say:
“I believe that there is something bigger to which we are all connected to, even though sometimes we don’t want to be linked, but… we really are. It is there».
My mother, a downright Catholic, did not name the “old” God of her clan. After looking at herself, she spoke of something that gave her true peace, something that -unlike her old God- does not scares her. And from that magic I felt closer to her than we have been in our entire life. We were no longer mother and daughter, we were… simply Magic and matter.
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